


tomorrow is twenty-five years away

by Astral_Bees



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: Angst, Happy Ending, I'll add more tags if I think of any, I'm Sorry, M/M, Time Loop, Walex - Freeform, but it's not mentioned, ghost bfs, reggie and luke are just already supposed to be together in this, side julynn, uhhh, whatever u call them, willex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-18
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:55:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27615178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Astral_Bees/pseuds/Astral_Bees
Summary: alex tries to save willie
Relationships: Alex/Willie (Julie and The Phantoms)
Comments: 35
Kudos: 89





	1. take one

**Author's Note:**

> i'm a fool and have been writing two jatp fics at the same time,, but unlike my lukereggie fic, this one is completely written out. so, it's just a matter of posting the chapters. hope u like it !! :)

Alex let his eyes drift shut against the early morning light. He still felt like he should sleep, but he knew he didn’t need to. His eyes weren’t closed for long, because as his mind started to clear, something hit his face. Lifting his hand to his cheek, Alex looked around the studio seeing that he’d been hit by one of his very own drumsticks. Luke smirked at Alex and waved.

With a groan, Alex sat up, swinging his legs off the couch. “What the hell was that for?”

“We were thinking about practicing.”

“And you couldn’t have, oh I don’t know, said that?” But even as Alex spoke, he was picking his stray drumstick up to join the three of them.

“Aww, you love us, man!” Luke’s smile carried through to his voice.

Alex flashed him a smile in return. “I love Julie and I love Reggie, but you? I’m not so sure.”

Luke slapped a hand over his heart and replied with a simple, “Ouch!”

Sitting behind his drums, Julie instructed them on where to start in the song. It didn’t take long for the music to take over the atmosphere of the room, stealing the faux drowsiness from inside Alex. He poured himself into the beat, letting his nerves flow out of him. Though his thoughts flickered in and out occasionally with images of Willie. He hadn’t been able to find him after their performance the night before. And he knew that every extra moment he spent not looking furthered the chance that Willie would already be gone. But he couldn’t tell the others that. So, he kept playing.

Plus, it was nice to know that they were still there. After thinking he was going to die for a second time, spending more time with his friends definitely wasn’t a bad way to use his afterlife.

They wrapped up the song and Alex stared at his cymbals for a few seconds in thought. He’d gone to The Hollywood Ghost Club the night before and he hadn’t been able to find Willie. But he also hadn’t managed to search the whole place. And Willie hadn’t been anywhere else they’d gone together. He didn’t know where else to look. They hadn’t had enough time together for Alex to know where he would hide. If he was hiding. Caleb could have already gotten to him. But Alex couldn’t entertain that line of thought. Not until he’d exhausted every other possibility. He wouldn’t give up on Willie.

“Alex? Dude, you there?”

He snapped his head up to see Luke standing right in front of him. A sheepish smile spread across his face and his cheeks felt warm. “Yeah, sorry… Just thinking.”

Luke nodded and pointed in Julie’s direction. “How do you feel about being a messenger?”

His brow furrowed, but Alex didn’t ask Luke anything further. Instead, he made his way over to Julie. It was both a slight surprise and relief when he rested a hand on her shoulder, and it didn’t go through her. Julie turned toward him at the contact. Her face lit up and she picked a letter up off the table beside her.

“Ok, so,” a nervous laugh bubbled out of her. “I was thinking of giving Flynn this letter… to y’know… tell her how I feel…”

Alex smiled and nodded. “Yeah?”

“Yeah, but… I was kinda hoping maybe you could drop it in her room for me? I don’t know if I’d be able to do it myself.”

“Leave it for her and go? That’s all?” he was looking down at the letter, a simple envelope with Flynn’s name written on it in Julie’s handwriting. There was something nice about it. A letter. A love letter.

She nodded and he put his hand out to take the letter from her. It felt light in his hand, but the small task felt much heavier. Julie was trusting him with this. With her feelings.

Taking the letter from her, he was giving his own silent promise. That he would do this for her. That he would get it to Flynn. And yet, he was worrying about Willie all over again.

Julie pulled him into a quick hug, and it took him a second to react, hugging her back when he finally did. She backed away and glanced at the letter one more time. “Thank you. I really don’t know if I would’ve been able to do this without your help.”

“Of course. I mean, I get it,” he softened his words with a light laugh and Julie smiled up at him before busying herself with the music equipment. Her hands moving carefully over her keyboard as she unplugged it. Alex could almost feel himself in the motion. He was too familiar with keeping his hands busy.

Sparing one quick glance around the studio, Alex poofed out.

He waited outside Flynn’s door, listening to see if he should go in. A few minutes of him standing awkwardly at her door and he heard her start playing some music. The music was unfamiliar to him, but Alex figured it meant he was probably safe to go in. Poking his head in, he was greeted by the sight of Flynn bouncing around. She shouted along to the lyrics of whatever she was listening to as he entered her room. Clutching the letter delicately in his hands, he stopped in front of her. But she didn’t notice the letter floating in the air, so he opted to leave it on her bed instead. It felt like the better option anyway.

Backing up reflexively as Flynn jumped closer to him, Alex hurried back out before she saw the letter. He didn’t want to risk intruding. It wasn’t his moment.

Alex decided to walk back to the studio. There was no rush for him to get back. So, he scanned his surroundings as he wandered down different streets. Willie had to be somewhere. He wasn’t gone. Alex just hadn’t found him yet. But he was going to. No one could stop him from finding Willie.

But every alley he checked was empty. And all of the streets he walked were filled up with only the living. Alex cursed himself silently for not thinking to ask Willie where he liked to go. For not coming up with a place to meet. But he had thought he was going to cross over. A meeting place wouldn’t have made any sense. There would have been no point in it.

Instead he was faced with the daunting reality that California was a big state and that wasn’t even the extent of where Willie could go. He could be anywhere. Or even worse, he could be nowhere.

Passing the museum they had visited together, Alex decided to check inside once more. Just in case. It was quiet. The museum closed for the day. He made his way through, peeking inside different sections. But everywhere he looked seemed completely empty.

“Willie? Are you here?”

No reply came. He was all alone.

Alex didn’t stick around any longer, unable to stand the memories that filled the space around him. He hadn’t thought Willie would be there, but it still stung knowing he was right. So, back to the studio he went. Julie would want to know about her letter, and he couldn’t let another person down.

Every step dragged him down. The sun looked pale in the sky, just a bright white blob.

He wracked his brain over any possible place Willie could be the entire walk back to the studio. But all he could think to do was to go back to the club and finish checking. Everything else was a question mark. A question mark with a barbed wire stinger on the end.

Julie was closing the studio doors behind her as Alex got back. When she turned around, she smiled up at him in mild surprise and anticipation.

“Hey.”

“Hey, Julie. I, uh, got your letter to Flynn.”

“Ok, cool. Thanks,” she started to rock back and forth, looking away from Alex. “Did she read it?”

“I don’t know. I sorta just set it on her bed and left. Hope that’s ok.”

“Yeah, that’s fine. Just curious, y’know?”

He nodded and rested a hand on her shoulder. Julie looked back up at him and he smiled in contrast with her small frown. “Everything’s gonna be fine. I promise.”

“I know,” she nodded distractedly, willing herself to believe her own words. “I know it is. It’s just Flynn. Yeah, it’s just Flynn.”

“Exactly. And Flynn loves you no matter what.”

Julie blushed slightly at his words and thanked him once more before excusing herself. She had things to do and so did he.

With one small weight off of his chest, Alex could pour all of his focus into the big weight that had been suffocating him since the night before. He’d looked already. He just had to look better. Somehow. And The Hollywood Ghost Club was the only place he could go. It called to him like a siren. Dangerous. Deadly. And far too mesmerizing. It was also the last place he knew Willie could be.

He stopped right outside the club, staring up at the towering building. Willie was in there. Or he was somewhere Alex didn’t know. Or…

Pushing his way in, Alex saw people crowded into the room. He blended in as best as he could, moving through the crowd to get back to where he’d stopped the night before. That door. Down. Where? He had no clue. Just down. His skin crawled at the thought of it. He was tempting fate.

Finding the door again, he slipped inside and hurried down the stairs. It was so dark. Too dark. He was struck by the memory of his first time seeing Reggie’s room. Darkness punctuated by a glowing nightlight and some glow in the dark accessories. If only he had something like that to cut up the dark that was bearing down on him.

He hit the bottom of the steps and waited for his eyes to adjust to the pitch black.

“Willie?” the name felt so small in the endless abyss Alex found himself in. He wanted to cry. He wanted to scream. He wanted Willie.

“Hello, Alex.”

Alex spun in a circle, trying to locate the direction the voice had come from. “C-Caleb?”

“What are you doing here? This room is for employees only and last I checked, you turned me down on that offer.”

Caleb’s voice bounced through the darkness, making it impossible for Alex to find its true source. He turned his head every which way, not wanting to let Caleb sneak up on him. Like a fool, he’d let himself get trapped. He’d lost.

“Where’s Willie?” he feigned bravery.

“Oh, he left. Why would I keep someone around that just wants to hurt the business?”

“You let him… leave?”

Footsteps. Coming from everywhere. Closer. Closer. And closer. Then, a voice by his ear, “Well, I made sure to give him a parting gift first. But yes, I let him leave.”

Alex’s heart dropped into his stomach. He was right. He’d lost. “Oh…”

“Don’t worry. I’m sure you two will be very happy.”

“What do you-?” Alex turned around, cutting himself off as he felt a hand on his back.

“Have fun tonight, Alexander,” the voice was distant again. “You know what they say, live each day like it’s your last.”

And somehow Alex was outside the club, back in the sunlight. It was disorienting. He stood, stunned for a moment. When his eyes readjusted and he came back to his senses, Alex checked to make sure Caleb wasn’t with him. The conversation rang in his ears as he ran. He ran far and fast and hard. His feet hitting the asphalt harder and harder each time. Once he felt like he was far enough away, Alex stopped and squeezed his eyes shut.

Willie wasn’t at the club. But he was somewhere. He wasn’t gone. Yet. But Caleb had done something to him. And Alex was pretty sure he could guess what.

A sharp pain interrupted Alex’s thoughts. A familiar pain. A jolt. No. No. No. Not again. Alex fell to the ground from the force of the pain. He heard Caleb’s smug last words and finally understood the meaning.

Recovering from the jolt, Alex poofed back to the studio. He had one night. But Julie could save him. Right?

Except she wasn’t in the studio when he got there. And she wasn’t in her house. And he couldn’t find her. Which was bad. Really bad. Because another jolt sparked through him. How was it so aggressive already?

He sputtered out a cough and collapsed on the studio’s couch. Everything hurt. Caleb was an asshole. Hadn’t he done enough? Apparently not.

Alex wasn’t sure how long he’d been suffering on the couch when he heard someone walk in. He looked around, but whoever it was was right outside his line of sight and he couldn’t turn his head. Another jolt shook him, followed closely by pain. Too much pain.

“Alex? Holy shit! Alex!” Luke knelt beside the couch, a mixture of pure fear and panic in his eyes.

“Luke?”

“What happened?” his words were so frantic, and they hurt Alex almost as much as the jolts.

“Caleb. I was-” another jolt. “was trying to find Willie.”

“I’ll get Julie! I’ll go get Julie! She can fix this,” Luke started to stand, but Alex grabbed his wrist.

“Just stay with me. Please?” a hot tear traced it’s way down his face as he looked up at Luke. “I don’t want to be alone again. I don’t want to die alone, Luke.”

Luke’s own eyes were rimmed with red as he knelt back down. He took Alex’s hand in his own and stayed there. They didn’t talk. They barely looked at each other. He was just there for Alex. Brushing a tear off of Alex’s cheek, Luke tried to smile. He didn’t succeed in his effort. But Alex smiled weakly back anyway.

“Hey, Luke.”

“Yeah?”

“I love you.”

“I love you too, man.” The words cracked as they fell from his lips.

Alex’s hand started to fade away in Luke’s, his form becoming more and transparent. It was ending. He was ending. And he thought that Willie had probably already gone through the exact same thing. But he didn’t have anyone. The thought pierced Alex’s heart. And then he looked at Luke, and his expression sent another harpoon straight through his heart.

“Alex! Don’t go! Alex!”

But it was too late. He’d lost. And as a consequence, he was gone.


	2. dream or reality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> alex wakes up?

A dull pain flashed on Alex’s cheek. He reached up and rubbed the spot lightly, trying to make it go away. Cracking his eyes open, he saw Luke smile and wave at him. One of his drumsticks was lying on the ground next to the couch. He had the weapon and the culprit.

“Again, dude? Seriously?”

Confusion passed over Luke’s features for a split second. “What are you talking about? That is the inaugural hit of the drumstick. Maybe tomorrow it’ll be again.”

Alex furrowed his brow, but he didn’t push the matter further. If Luke wanted to lie that was fine. But… Oh. He looked around the studio and then checked up and down himself. He was fine. He looked normal. A dream. He’d had a bizarre nightmare. Anxiety. It was his stress messing with him. Playing with his thoughts of Willie. Great.

But he didn’t remember falling asleep.

Alex shrugged it off and stood from the couch, his nonexistent muscles a little tense.

“We were thinking about practicing.” Luke again.

Alex nodded and settled down beside his drums. He already knew that.

The déjà vu from his dream followed Alex through the whole practice. It was the weirdest sense. Like he’d predicted the future in his sleep, but he couldn’t quite grasp the memories in their entirety. He kept trying to brush the feeling off, but it returned every time without fail.

“Alex? Dude, you there?”

Luke was standing in front of him and his drums. He narrowed his eyes, the déjà vu prickling in the back of his mind. “Yeah, sorry… just this day feels familiar. I don’t know.”

Shrugging, Luke pointed over at Julie. “Don’t know about all that, but how do you feel about being a messenger?”

The letter.

Alex got up and walked over to Julie without answering Luke. He stopped in front of her, causing her to look up. She smiled at Alex and grabbed the letter that was sitting on top of the coffee table. It looked exactly the same as it had in his dream. Flynn’s name in Julie’s handwriting. He’d already given it to her. But he hadn’t. Because there it was, still in Julie’s hands.

“You want me to take that to Flynn for you?” the words were coming out of his mouth before he could even think to stop himself.

“Huh?” Julie’s eyes widened and then her gaze drifted down to the letter she was holding. “Oh… Yeah, I’m just worried I wouldn’t be able to do it myself.”

He nodded, trying not to think of the continuous feeling that he’s been there before. Alex covered his own confusion with a smile and set a gentle hand on her arm. “I’ll get it to her.”

“Really?” Julie’s eyes searched his face for any hint of hesitation and when she couldn’t find any, she wrapped him in a quick hug. “Thank you!”

Taking the letter from her, Alex turned and headed out. He gave one last wave over his shoulder as he left, slipping out into the afternoon sunlight. Outside of the studio, Alex could feel some of his thoughts begin to jumble all together. He’d been holding it together as best as he could in front of the others, but alone… alone he was free to dwell.

His dream clung to him like smoke. A deep acrid smoke that he couldn’t see through and he couldn’t clear out. But the worst part of it all was that it was just a feeling, drifting away from his consciousness. He could hear the echoes, but there was no picture. It was confusion all the way down. Alex was lost. Falling and falling and falling. Down a well of his own dreams. And he thought that if he could just remember what had happened, maybe he could get away from the smoke.

Alex found his way to Flynn’s house, no problem. Not even really aware that he was there until he was standing at the front door. He stared up at it and raised his hand to knock. But when he realized what he was doing, he quickly lowered it.

Passing through the door, Alex spared a quick glance around the house. Just as he’d thought, it looked vaguely familiar. Even though he’d never been there before. He shrugged it off the same way he’d shrugged everything else off and made his way up to Flynn’s room. He found it on the first try. Though it wasn’t particularly hard to guess which room was hers based on the fact that it had a number of colorful stickers covering the door.

Soft opening notes of a song drifted out from beyond the door. Alex stood for a moment, listening to the song Flynn was playing. It picked up its pace quickly and he could hear her singing along. Another brief moment passed, and Alex figured he should go in.

Unsurprisingly, Flynn was bouncing around her room. Her energy filled the space even more than the music could and he smiled despite his worries. Alex could feel the way the music bounced off the walls and how Flynn’s jumping added to the beat. It was tempting to forget why he was there and dance along with her instead. But the letter was too solid to forget and the longer he stuck around, the more likely it was that Flynn would notice him. And he didn’t want to explain his presence.

Another wave of déjà vu.

Alex shook it off as best as he could, setting the letter on top of her phone. It muffled the music ever-so-slightly and he hoped that meant Flynn would notice it sooner than later. He didn’t want Julie to have to wait on tenterhooks for Flynn to read it.

He watched her dance around a moment longer, letting the song wash over him. He didn’t know it. But he’d heard it before. He was almost positive.

With the song coating him and the letter in Flynn’s room, Alex left the way he’d come in. He had somewhere else he needed to be. Somewhere that made his mind flash with warning lights. Somewhere that sent chills down his arms and shivers up his spine. He had to go to The Hollywood Ghost Club even though everything in his body was telling him no.

Alex was fully aware whatever happened next wasn’t going to be good. He could feel the danger humming through him, and he was choosing to ignore it. The déjà vu and worry screamed inside his mind, reaching a fever pitch. But he couldn’t let it stop him. He wouldn’t let it stop him.

The sun dipped behind the horizon just slightly as he approached the building that housed The Hollywood Ghost Club. Alex sucked in a deep breath even though he didn’t need to and entered.

Inside, the club shined and shimmered the way he remembered from the last time he’d been there. There were fewer people, but it was still a sizable crowd. Big enough to get lost in. Or at least, he hoped it was. Because, grabbing a stray coat, Alex slipped among the others. He weaved between groups of people, making his way through the throng. The other side of the room seemed suddenly a million miles away with him set adrift in the sea. And even as he moved closer to it, he felt his hopes dash against the rocks.

Standing right in front of the door he’d been hoping to go through, was Caleb. Alex turned on his heel and started back through the crowd, going the other way. He remembered he could poof out as a hand clamped down on his shoulder.

Staring at the hand, as if he could will it away with his mind, Alex knew he was screwed. Because he couldn’t make it disappear. And Caleb had him.

“What a pleasure to see you again, Alex,” his voice slithered around Alex, squeezing and constricting and crushing. “I wasn’t expecting to see you back here so soon.”

“Well, I was actually just leaving, so…” Alex hated how nervous his own words sounded. How sour they tasted.

“Oh no, stay for the show! I insist.”

Before Alex could object, Caleb was snapping his fingers and pushing him into a chair that someone had brought over. Caleb’s grip on his shoulder tightened and then he let go, smiling down at Alex. He spun around and was on the stage in an instant.

Alex started to stand, to get out of there. But when he did, a jolt flashed within him. The pain sent him back down into the chair with a solid thud. His arm wrapped around his middle defensively and he watched Caleb dance across the stage. How could he possibly lose to this guy after everything? He felt so fucking stupid. And so impossibly alone. Even in a crowd as big as the one around him.

He tried to stand again, crying out in pain when another jolt took him down. But instead of landing on the chair again, Alex collapsed on the ground. Nobody even spared so much as a single glance in his direction. He was a silent inconvenience in the middle of a showstopping performance. He was dying.

Pulling himself across the floor, Alex found his thoughts drifting to Julie. He hadn’t let her know that he’d dropped off her letter. He hadn’t spoken to her since he’d taken it from her. No one would know what had happened to him until it was too late. They would learn about his fate and there would be nothing they could do. Or worse, they would never know exactly why he vanished. He would just be gone. A flickering flame that someone had finally remembered to blow out.

He could feel tears pooling in his eyes as he crawled closer to the stairs. If he could just pull himself up with the railing. Maybe… Maybe he could leave. Maybe he wouldn’t die in the club. That would be some form of victory. Wouldn’t it?

After what felt like years, Alex reached the railing. He latched onto it and pulled, barely managing to get back onto his feet. But once he had, he started walking. He started walking and he didn’t look back and he didn’t think about the pain that coursed through him every time another jolt went off. All he knew was that he had to get out. He couldn’t die there. Not in the club. Not with Caleb’s satisfied smirk swimming in the corners of his vision. No, he couldn’t. He just couldn’t.

His foot caught on the last stair and Alex stumbled, but he didn’t go down. Instead, he picked up his pace as much as he could manage. Soon enough, Alex was outside. The air brushed through the trees and he stared up at them with blurry eyes.

Everything was so beautiful, the sky slowly fading from the eruption of color that was the sunset. The stars emerging, dotting the coming dark like tiny pinpricks.

Another jolt and he was flat on his back, staring up, up, up at the sky. It consumed his whole field of vision, a wide expanse of everything. He still hurt, but there was some form of calm that washed over him. Lapping at the edges of his mind. It didn’t feel like the end. He couldn’t understand why. But something inside him kept whispering that it wasn’t the end for him. Which was a lie. Of course, it was. Just some comfort in his final moments.

But then his arms went numb and his mind flashed with images from the day before. No, the same day. The same day, but different. The thought didn’t make any sense until it did. He hadn’t been experiencing déjà vu from a dream. He hadn’t dreamt any of it at all.

He was flipping through a calendar that contained a single day.

And as he realized this fact that seemed entirely untrue, he faded away into the night sky. Another star on the black backdrop. A distant memory.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> once again, i'm sorry... but,, uh,,, have a nice day !! :)


	3. again and again and again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> we find ourselves again, at the start

Instinctively, Alex’s hand shot up to his cheek, which caused the drumstick to smack against the back of his hand instead of his face. He was back. And the memories of the past two days reverberated in his head, bouncing into each other and echoing all around. He was caught up in time. And he wasn’t any closer to finding Willie.

“Whoa, shit! If you’d had your eyes open, you might’ve been able to catch that, dude!”

Alex sat up on the couch, opening his eyes despite the urge he had to just lie there for the rest of the day. He flicked a quick glance in Luke’s direction and shook his head, in a manner he hoped came off as mildly teasing. “You ever think maybe you shouldn’t throw things at people’s faces?”

Pondering the question, Luke scrunched up his face. After a moment he shrugged, grinned dopily, and said, “Nope!”

“Cool. That’s great, man.”

“Get on over here! We’re gonna start practice.”

“I would, but I have to go somewhere really quickly. I’ll be back soon. Promise.” Alex was lying, but they didn’t need to know that. There was no way he could say he would return anytime soon. At best, he would die again and wake up exactly where he was. And they’d be none the wiser.

He poofed out as soon as he’d finished speaking so Julie couldn’t ask him to deliver her letter. It made him feel a little guilty, but he could worry about it the next time she asked. Or tomorrow. Whatever came first.

Popping back in outside of his destination, he grimaced at the mere sight of The Hollywood Ghost Club. It had been the cause of his demise twice so far and even though he knew he was playing with a third time, he also realized it was probably the only place he could get an answer. And he needed an answer. Not about what was happening to Willie. He had a pretty good idea of what the answer to that was. No, he wanted to know where Willie would have gone. He needed to know.

Bursting in, Alex didn’t waste time with trying to be sneaky. There was no point. The one person that could have his answer, was the same person he would have been trying to hide from.

“Caleb!” his voice carried through the nearly empty room.

It took a moment for Caleb to emerge from the stairwell. “Yes, Alexander? I believe you called for me?”

Alex steadied his stance, making sure to stand his ground. He couldn’t show weakness. Not in front of Caleb. “Yeah, I did. I want one thing from you. No lies, no games, just one thing.”

Caleb surveyed him, then waved his hand dismissively as if he’d sized him up completely and found him wanting. “William’s not here. So, I’m afraid your request has been denied.”

“I know Willie’s not here.”

“Oh?” intrigue crept into Caleb’s voice. “Then what is it you want? And more importantly, what can you give me in return?”

“I want to know where Willie would go. You can destroy me. You can make me a part of your house band. I just want to know where he is, since he’s not here.” Alex’s voice quivered on the last bit and he silently cursed his emotions. They weren’t helpful in the slightest when he was facing a ghost like Caleb.

“Is that all? That’s an easy one,” Caleb smirked. A dangerous thing, wicked and sharp. “He went home.”

“Home?” the word felt so very small on Alex’s tongue. “Where’s that?”

“Tsk tsk. You got your one thing, now I get mine.”

Caleb moved closer and closer and even though Alex was fairly certain he would wake up on the couch again, his mouth went dry. His vision darkened and he shook ever-so-slightly, trying to back away from the touch. There was no use. He’d known what he had been signing up for when he’d gone there. But he was one step closer to finding Willie. One step closer to saving him? He hoped.

-

The drumstick hit his cheek and then it hit the floor and Alex didn’t bother looking at it. He didn’t even flinch. After dying four times, Luke throwing a stick at his face just didn’t seem like a big deal. It was something he figured he’d have to get used to depending on how long he would be trapped in the loop. And that single thought got him to sit up. He didn’t know how long the loop would last. He could be trapped for the rest of time.

His fingers flew to his rings, spinning one around to try and calm himself. The time loop wasn’t all bad. He could handle it. It would be fine. And he could use it to help Willie. 

Maybe Julie too if he had the time.

But as it was, he only had one word on his mind. Home.

“I have to head out. I’ll be back later.”

Three sets of eyes turned to him as Alex poofed out. He stopped outside the local library, thinking about what he was going to do. It wasn’t anything major, but he wasn’t sure he wanted to do it. But, in he went, making a beeline to the computers. He threw himself into a chair, almost certain his nerves would somehow send him right through it. Thankfully, he landed in the seat.

Not wasting any time, Alex got to work typing away. He looked up the only thing he could think to search. California teen, fatal skateboarding accident. A few weird articles popped up that seemed to be completely unrelated and the location of a hospital appeared too. Alex scrolled past all of those, continuing his search. Not far down on the first page was an article that seemed right. He clicked on it and scoured the paragraphs for any information on Willie.

The article told him two things. Willie’s name. And the day he died.

And even though he knew Willie had died. Even though that was the only reason they’d met. It still hurt to read about it. Because Willie had had people that loved him. He’d had a home.

Swallowing the lump in his throat, Alex wrote the information down on a nearby pad of paper and stood. He shoved the paper into his fannypack and left. His next stop was awaiting him. And he would make it there even if it killed him.

Sifting through the city’s database, Alex searched Willie’s name. The first thing to pop up that was about his Willie was his death certificate. Another reminder of the truth. He ran his eyes down the screen, seeking out his personal information. Looking in a few different spots, Alex found what he’d been looking for. Willie’s old address. His home.

He jotted the information on the same piece of paper that had Willie’s full name and stared at the address. Frozen at the computer, Alex couldn’t look away. He had reached the part that scared him the most. Not Caleb. Not his death. But Willie.

Footsteps sounded outside the door and Alex shot up, poofing out. He landed at the front door of the building he’d just been inside. Playing with his rings, Alex committed the address to memory and started walking. He had to face the music. He had to see Willie. Even though he knew it was going to hurt. Because the voice in the back of his head was getting louder the closer he got to Willie. What if there was no saving him?

The house was nice. A soft blue paint covered the outside of it and Alex could picture Willie skating the sidewalk in front of it. It brought the faint hint of a smile to his lips.

Phasing through the door, Alex stopped at the sight of people. Living people. Willie’s family. A girl, he assumed Willie’s sister, walked past him to another room. She didn’t notice him, not that she should have. But it felt wrong somehow. To be there in that house, surrounded by Willie’s family. He was an invisible intruder breaking into their lives to find their already dead son.

“How are you here?”

The voice caught Alex off-guard, even though it was the exact reason he was there in the first place. Turning slowly, he saw a beanbag chair pushed into the corner of the room he was in. And lying on top of it was a desaturated Willie. The sight forced tears into his eyes, but Alex blinked them back.

“The Orpheum wasn’t our unfinished business,” he shrugged, smiling sadly.

“But Caleb,” a shuddering breath broke off Willie’s thought. “The jolts…”

“Julie, um, Julie was able to heal us? And I was thinking she could help you too.”

“Oh,” Willie rested his head against the beanbag chair, the effort of holding it up becoming too much. “Alex… I can’t leave.”

Willie’s words hit him, and Alex remembered his first death of the loop, when Luke had been by his side. But this was different. It had to be different. Because he couldn’t let Willie die. He couldn’t. Not when there was something he could do to change it. “You have to. We just have to get to the studio. That’s all.”

“No, you don’t understand. It’s not… that I don’t want… to leave. I can’t.”

“What? Why not?”

Smiling up at the ceiling, a tear rolled down Willie’s face. “You’re too late.”

“No, no, I’m not. We just have to get to the studio. To Julie.” Alex knelt at Willie’s side, gripping his hand. “Please.”

A sob broke its way out of him, and he cursed the sadness that was taking over. He needed to convince Willie there was time. But how could he do anything if he became an emotional mess? Alex looked out the nearest window, trying, trying, trying to control his tears and his voice and himself.

Willie squeezed his hand and Alex turned back to him. “I’m sorry, Alex. I’m so sorry.”

“Willie, please…”

An angry jolt spread through Willie, his grip on Alex’s hand becoming painful. Alex winced slightly, but he didn’t say anything, and he didn’t look away. When it had passed, Willie curled in on himself. He opened his mouth to say something, but Alex could see him getting weaker. And if he focused on the edges of Willie, he could see where he was beginning to fade. Willie was right, he was too late.

Finally finding his voice, Willie choked out two things, “See you soon, hot dog. I won’t forget you.”

He placed his free hand on Alex’s cheek, stroking his thumb lightly over it. And before Alex could say anything, do anything, Willie was gone.

The sky cracked open, suddenly drenching the world. Alex glared at the window because the rain… the rain felt like betrayal. He had always trusted rain. Followed its path out into the open when it streamed down, just to get some semblance of comfort. But there it was, falling for all the wrong reasons. And Willie was gone. And Alex was surrounded by memories of Willie before and Willie after and the rain, the pouring rain. He was trapped in a place he didn’t belong. Trapped in some fucked up purgatory.

And as the rain streamed onto the ground and the roof of Willie’s house, Alex cried. He didn’t have a reason not to. He only had reasons to. Was positively filled to the brim with reasons to break apart. Because, on top of everything else, he would have to do it all over again.

Alex stayed, surrounded by the whispers of Willie’s life, and listening to the storm outside instead. He stayed in the spot where Willie had been until he felt his consciousness slipping through his fingers. He stayed until he couldn’t.

-

Tears hit his cheeks long before the drumstick managed to. Lying on the studio’s couch, Alex settled into the day. He had to be ok. He had to pretend. So, he cracked his eyes open and looked over at Luke’s grin. It was something. It was better than thinking about Willie.

Swinging his legs over the side of the couch, Alex rubbed his cheek. “Dude, you can’t just throw things at people’s faces.”

“What are you gonna do about it? Haunt me?” Luke held up his hands, wiggling his fingers and Alex threw the drumstick back at him. It hit Luke’s leg, bouncing off and landing on the ground again. Luke bent down and snatched the drumstick up.

Alex stood, hands in the air in surrender as he walked over. He put a hand out for the drumstick and Luke dropped it into his open palm.

“We were thinking of practicing.”

With a slight nod, Alex sat behind his drums. He needed a break. From death. His and… Well, just death.

The music started up and even though he could tell he was being more aggressive with his playing than he should have been, he didn’t stop. It was all he could do to not break down in the middle of the song. Playing, and playing hard, was the only solution he had right in front of him. So, when the others cast worried looks his way, he just smiled back in a way that he hoped was reassuring. Because while he played, he knew he was losing time. He was losing and losing and losing. But he played anyway. He couldn’t go back. Not yet.

As the song wrapped up, Alex stared down at the sticks in his hands. He had the sudden urge to throw them. To scream. To cry. But he simply set them down on his drum set and got up, stretching out his legs.

He didn’t wait for Luke to walk up to him. Instead, he made his way over to Julie and he smiled gently at her. She looked up at him and then looked away, a realization on her face. When she turned back to him, the oh so familiar letter was in her hand. He could feel a little bit of her hesitation. A little bit of her hope. It felt good. Like something warm and bright in the middle of the typhoon he was trapped in.

“Ok, so,” a nervous laugh bubbled out of her. “I was thinking of giving Flynn this letter… to y’know… tell her how I feel…”

“And you want me to be the messenger?”

She paused, holding the letter in front of her. “Actually, yeah. If that’s ok?”

“Of course it is, Jules. I’ll get it to her,” his voice softened more. “I promise.”

Letting out a big sigh, Julie placed it lightly in his hand. She gave him a quick hug and if he hadn’t been holding himself together, Alex would have shattered at the small gesture. “Thank you so so much.”

One nod and he was gone. Back at Flynn’s door, listening to the song that he realized he only recognized from the other times he’d been there. It wasn’t a bad song. It was actually pretty fun. He could understand why she was dancing around to it on her own, making time for herself. And he thought about joining her in dancing along, but he didn’t really feel much like having fun.

Placing the letter in the same place he had the last time he’d been there, Alex left.

He didn’t go back to the studio. And he didn’t go to Willie. No, Alex went back to the museum. He knew it would be empty and he needed somewhere he could be alone. And he had a feeling the museum would be good for that.

Sitting on the bench he and Willie had moved together, Alex fell apart. He couldn’t get the image of Willie out of his head. Broken and hurting. There was no way he could have saved him. And he knew that Willie was going through the exact same thing all over again. But he was alone. It felt wrong. Not being there for him. But Alex wasn’t sure how to face that again. He wasn’t sure what he could do. Would it be enough to get there earlier? He would try to help him when he woke up. He had just needed one day.

But that was the problem. He only had one day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok,, hope u liked chapter three !! have a great day and stay safe everybody :)


	4. to barely exist today

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the days start coming and they don't stop coming :)

He put his hand up before the drumstick could hit him, already unprepared for what his day would hold. The stick clattered to the ground because even though Alex had been through the events multiple times, he wasn’t able to catch it out of the air.

Luke started to say something, but Alex sat up and cut him off before he could finish. “I have to go take care of something really quickly. It might take me a while, but we can practice when I get back.”

He didn’t wait for any replies. He didn’t look at their faces. He just left. It wasn’t that big of a deal. He’d already done it before; they just didn’t know that.

Willie’s house was more intimidating the second time around. Which seemed like it shouldn’t have been possible. But there Alex was. Outside and desperately hoping he didn’t have to go back in. He could already see Willie in his mind, and he was too aware of what he was walking into. Shaking his arms out to disperse some of his nerves, Alex walked in.

Pressing himself against the front door once he was inside, Alex prepared himself. He stepped out into the path of the beanbag chair, ready to face Willie. But he wasn’t there. Alex did a full three-sixty, searching the room for any trace of him. He was alone.

A burning sensation filled his chest and he hurried into the other rooms. The downstairs was completely abandoned, so he ran up the stairs. Checking behind each door, he couldn’t find any person. Living or otherwise. Instead, he found Willie’s room. It was dark inside and there was a layer of dust blanketing the desk. Everything looked like it had been left untouched since Willie’s death, but Alex couldn’t be sure. It wasn’t like he had any frame of reference.

Being careful not to disturb anything, Alex wandered around the room. He glanced at the notebooks and pens scattered across his desk. The random thoughts on sticky notes that cluttered up one wall. And the knee and elbow pads that looked too small to have been useful for Willie when he was alive.

Upon closer inspection, the only thing that seemed newly moved was Willie’s closet door. Pulling it open, Alex saw a number of clothes that were thrown on the ground instead of placed back on their hangers. He crouched down and picked a shirt up. It was one he recognized. A tie-dyed crop top. The realization that Willie had been coming back to his room for his clothes made Alex sad. But he couldn’t exactly figure out why. Setting the shirt back on the pile, he stood and closed the closet door.

As he moved to look at a few pictures, Alex heard the front door open. He startled for a moment, worrying that he would be caught, before he remembered that Willie was the only one that would be able to see him.

Slipping out of Willie’s room, he peaked over the stair’s railing to see who was downstairs. He could only see a girl settling onto the living room couch. But two voices sounded from a room nearby.

Alex walked the rest of the way down the stairs and glanced at the beanbag chair. And just as he’d expected to see earlier, Willie was lying on top of it. His eyes widened when he noticed Alex and then a jolt surged through him, causing him to curl in on himself.

Wincing, Alex rushed to his side.

“Are you ok?” he asked once the jolt had passed.

Willie smiled, the surprise from seconds earlier still visible underneath it. “Yeah, for now.”

Alex nodded, not letting go of Willie’s hand. He looked better than he had the first time and Alex was holding onto that fact. Because maybe it meant he was early enough. Maybe it meant he had time to save him.

“How are you here?”

“Things went differently with The Orpheum than we’d expected,” Alex started. “and Julie was able to save us. Which is why I’m here.”

“Alex…”

“We just have to get you to her. It’s just that.” He pleaded with Willie.

A gentle silence pushed them apart as Willie thought it over. He nodded briefly and tried to push himself off the beanbag chair, but another jolt sent him back down.

“Can you help me?”

But Alex didn’t need to be asked. He was already lending his arm to Willie for support. Working together, Willie got to his feet. As Alex steadied him, he glanced at a clock on the wall. There were still a few hours before Willie would disappear. Julie could fix this. And they were going to find her.

Poofing to the studio, Alex sat Willie on the couch and looked for Julie. She wasn’t in the room. Facing Willie, Alex made sure he was ok for a little bit.

“I’ll be right back.”

Racing to the house, Alex caught sight of Ray at the kitchen counter. But he was the only one that Alex could see. Heading up to the second floor, he called out, “Julie! Where are you?”

There was no response.

Poking his head through the doors as he passed them, Alex saw Carlos in his room. He paused for a moment outside of Julie’s room before stepping inside. It was empty. She wasn’t home and she wasn’t in the studio. And Willie was. His whole plan was crumbling around him. Breathing in shakily, Alex sat down on the floor.

Tears pricked his eyes and he tried to choke them back, but it was no use.

Once Alex had managed to get ahold of his emotions, he did the one last thing he could for Willie. He went back to the studio and sat with him. It wasn’t much. But it was all he had time for.

And as Willie faded away, Alex combed his fingers through his hair until he couldn’t anymore.

-

Alex put Julie’s letter on Flynn’s bed, sitting next to it. He closed his eyes and listened to the music. And as he sat there, he felt a little better. Because the song was upbeat and Flynn was singing along to it and Willie was still alive for the moment. Even if he wasn’t with him.

He stayed longer than he intended though, because the music stopped suddenly, and his eyes fluttered open. Flynn was standing closer than she had been when he’d last looked at her, holding the envelope in her hands. Alex stood, backing away from her. He had to go before she opened the letter, but he kind of wanted to see her reaction. Throughout all of the repeats, he hadn’t found out how Flynn felt about Julie.

Against his better judgement, Alex lingered near one wall of Flynn’s room as she slid the letter out of the envelope. Reading it slowly, her face showed a full range of emotions before settling on a soft blush. Alex smiled to himself and poofed back to the studio.

Julie was still there, and he stopped her before she could go anywhere.

“You should talk to Flynn.”

“What? Why? Did something go wrong with the letter?”

Alex placed his hands on her shoulders, and spoke softly, “Nothing bad happened. Nothing bad at all.”

It took Julie a moment to process what he was saying, but when she did, she looked up at him hesitantly. “It was positive?”

He nodded and her hesitation evaporated. Grinning, Julie hugged him tightly and hurried to the studio doors. She paused with one hand on the handle.

“Thanks, Alex.”

“Anytime, Jules.”

Julie left and Alex returned to Willie’s house. He sat with him through the jolts and the end. And then he sat alone with the rain until the day started over.

-

Alex drifted through more and more days to no avail. Willie kept slipping right through his fingers. And he didn’t know how they kept missing Julie.

She was there when he didn’t desperately need her and gone when he did. A phantom in her own right.

The pattern of the day ingrained itself into Alex’s mind, a schedule that he wanted to throw out. He wanted to wake up tomorrow. But tomorrow was so far away. And he hadn’t figured out how to save Willie. Somehow, despite being given seemingly limitless time, he still couldn’t figure out how to save Willie.

-

Sometime in the double-digit mark of days, Alex finally gave up on getting Willie to Julie in time. He needed to focus his efforts on something more attainable. And the first thing that came to mind, that seemed so obvious once he thought of it, was to bring Julie to Willie.

Sitting up from the couch, Alex didn’t waste any time grabbing Julie’s hand. He dragged her away from the studio, away from her house, all without explaining why.

He didn’t stop when she asked where he was taking her, but he tried to explain as best as he could over his shoulder. There wasn’t enough time to stop walking. They had to save him. And Julie had always been his last hope. So, he gave her the bullet points of what was happening as they moved. Because Alex didn’t want to stress her out, but he couldn’t take extra time to explain it properly.

Getting the gist, Julie hurried to keep up with him. Alex was suddenly wishing he could transport Julie to Willie’s immediately. But walking was the best they could do.

Outside his house, Alex had Julie wait across the street. He did a quick check to see if Willie was home, even though he knew it wasn’t time for that yet. Making sure he was right, Alex joined Julie on the other side of the street. He trained his eyes on the house, but finally filled her in on the details he’d left out on their trip over.

“He should be back soon,” Alex reassured her despite Julie not being the one needing reassurance. She was the one with the least to lose.

Patting his back, Julie nodded. “Ok.”

True to Alex’s words, Willie and his family returned before long. Parting from Julie again, Alex intercepted Willie outside of the house.

“Willie,” Alex rushed through his words. “I need you to come with me.”

Opening his mouth to say something, probably the same question he always asked, Willie was cut off by Alex pulling him across the asphalt. He didn’t let go of Willie’s arm until they were both standing in front of Julie.

“This is Julie and I think she can help you. She was able to save Luke, Reggie, and me from the jolts.”

Willie looked between Julie and Alex, wordlessly. A jolt rippled through him and he doubled over, falling to the ground from the force of it. Alex dropped to his side, looking up at Julie with desperation.

“Julie, you have to do whatever it was you did with us, please.”

The pity in her eyes, her voice, was nearly too much to bear when she finally replied. “Alex, I can’t. I can’t even see him. I’m so sorry.”

“No, please. You have to. Please, I don’t know what else to do.” Alex’s words scratched all the way through his throat, feeling more like acid reflux than sentences.

“I wish I could.”

Willie wrapped his arms around his stomach as another jolt pulsed purple light into the world and it seemed like that was how he had always been. Where there had once been warmth and sunlight, everything was now pain and lightning. He was losing him. Everyday, Alex was losing him, and Julie couldn’t help.

Tears slid down Alex’s face and he let his hopes dash against the rocks. It was over. He had finally, officially lost. He was going to be stuck forever.

A drumstick hit his face and he woke up.

-

Alex was struck by a deep, dark fear as he felt the sting of the drumstick. A new fear.

It wasn’t the worry that he would be stuck in the loop forever. It was the worry that he wouldn’t. That he would fail one too many times and be forced back into his proper afterlife. Without Willie.

Losing Willie over and over again hurt. It was more unbearable than he cared to admit. But losing Willie completely? That would be so much worse.

Alex sunk deeper into the couch cushions, ignoring everyone talking around him. He didn’t want to face the day. Not after everything. Not when he could risk wasting one more day just to feel a little semblance of peace. He would do something about his fear when the day started over. But right then and there, in that version of the day, he had decided to not do anything. To barely exist.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok,, so there's only one chapter left after this. thanks for reading so far :) hope u have a great day and stay safe out there <3


	5. one last day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the final tries

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here's the last chapter !! hope u've enjoyed so far :)

Waking up once more to a drumstick against his cheek, Alex looked over at his friends. He smiled despite the heaviness in his chest and sat up. Luke opened his mouth to speak, but Alex cut him off before he could get anything out.

“I have to go out, but I was hoping you could come with me?” The last part was directed at Julie.

She looked back at him in slight surprise. “What?”

“There’s something that I need your help with. I can explain when we get there.”

Julie glanced at the other two. Reggie shrugged and Luke seemed confused, but when she turned to Alex again, she nodded. “Ok, I’ll go.”

Offering her his hand, Alex and Julie left the studio hand-in-hand. They tracked their way along sidewalks, moving seamlessly between the other people around them. If Julie knew where they were going, she didn’t say anything until they’d reached the exact neighborhood.

Stopping at Flynn’s driveway, Julie looked between Alex and the house. “Why are we here? I thought you needed help with something.”

“Ok, I might have, possibly, lied a little bit.” He put his hands up in mock surrender and continued. “But I did it for a good reason! Promise.”

Julie’s eyes were trained on Flynn’s window. “So, what’s your reason?”

Playing with one of his rings, Alex stared at the cracks in the sidewalk. “I know about your letter.”

Whirling to face him, Julie’s eyes widened, and she struggled to form a sentence. Eventually, she reached a fully formed thought and started up. “How do you know about that? I… I had it hidden away.”

“It’s a long story and I don’t exactly have the time right now… or, I guess I do… but not really.” He shook his head, stopping his thoughts from meandering any further. “Basically, I just know. And I also know that you should tell her in person. It’ll go well.”

Julie searched his face for any hint of a lie, but they both knew he wouldn’t do that to her. Interlocking her fingers, she gazed at Flynn’s window one more time. “Ok, if you’re one hundred percent certain, I’ll do it face to face.”

Alex smiled down at her and gave her a quick hug. “I’m positive. Trust me.”

Smiling back at him, Julie pulled away and walked up the driveway. She stopped at the front door, waving briefly at Alex before she knocked. One of Flynn’s dads answered the door, letting Julie in as soon as he saw that it was her. And once Julie was inside, Alex left. He knew how it would go. He knew she wouldn’t need him to be there. He knew there was someone who needed him more.

Alex walked to Willie’s house. He was prolonging the inevitable, but was that really so bad? The inevitable was inevitable and it would still happen whether he walked or poofed.

The people that he passed varied in their moods. Some were happy and others seemed annoyed by the constant crowd. A few held hands as they walked. And while Alex no longer had a life, he’d found some hope in death. Because there were still people that cared about him. There were still emotions to be felt. The only thing that seemed so entirely unfair was what was happening to Willie. He, Reggie, and Luke had survived, so why was Willie any different? Why was Willie’s face the one that had to fade from the crowd?

Looking up at the sky, Alex couldn’t spot a single cloud that let him know it would rain later. Everything was blue skies. The world seemed right. But it wasn’t. He knew that.

Willie’s house was still blue and still perfectly normal from the outside. It remained the same as when he first saw it. But it wasn’t like Alex was expecting anything different. The day would go the way it always did with minor alterations he caused. The rundown would still amount to him seeing Willie and staying with him until he completely vanished.

At least he’d helped Julie.

Standing in the upstairs hallway, Alex thought of his first meeting with Willie. He thought of how bright he was. How lively he was despite the fact that they were both ghosts. How happy they’d been when they’d met up again. It was easier then. But there, in Willie’s house, nothing was easy anymore.

Alex took his time walking down the stairs. He caught sight of Willie and paused, his breath hitching in his throat. He was wrong. There was one thing that was different.

Alex knew he couldn’t save Willie.

Calming himself as best as he could, Alex forced himself down the rest of the steps. He faced Willie, raising his hand in a half-hearted wave. The confusion that he’d grown accustomed to clouded Willie’s features and Alex jumped in before the inevitable questions.

“I’m here because we didn’t figure out our unfinished business. But Julie saved us. It’s all good.”

Willie nodded and coughed out a weak, “Sorry to break the news to you, hot dog. But it’s not all good.”

“I know.”

His eyes widened and Alex couldn’t keep eye contact. “You know? How?”

“Honestly, that’s a longer story than The Orpheum and you don’t have that time.” Tears pricked his eyes as he spoke, and Alex blinked rapidly to push them back. He could hold it back. He’d done it before. It was no sweat to do it again. Not if it kept Willie from worrying even more.

“Yeah,” Willie smiled sadly. “I guess I don’t.”

“But I’m here. I’ll be here.” Alex met his eyes again, Willie’s sad smile reflected in his own expression. “I’ll always be here.”

Picking at a stray thread on his shirt, Willie gave up on his smile. A tear dropped onto his shirt, making a small circle on the fabric. Alex joined him on the beanbag chair and pulled Willie’s head to his chest. Stroking his hair, Alex tried to think of something to say that could help. But there wasn’t anything. There wasn’t a single sentence that seemed right for the moment. What does someone say when they know the person they care so much about is moments away from being gone forever? Not forever. For that version of the day.

Words had never been enough for Alex. Luke knew how to work with words. And so did Julie. Reggie made everything work for him, but he wasn’t the best with words either. But Alex? Alex was the worst with words. They got stuck or twisted or all torn up. He was good with actions. It was just usually too much pressure to ever act on his thoughts for his actions to mean much of anything.

But what pressure was there when the day would get erased? What pressure was there when everything would be forgotten? Maybe it was time to go against the nonstop thoughts in his head.

“Willie?” his voice was small, anxious.

Shifting to look at Alex, Willie suffered another purple shockwave. But once it had passed, he met Alex’s eyes. “Yeah?”

“Can I…” Alex stopped. Started again. “Can I kiss you? Before you go.”

Willie’s eyes widened and then he grinned despite the circumstances. And Alex got a piece of Willie back. Just a little part. But it was enough. The room was brighter, and everything seemed just the slightest bit better.

“I don’t know, can you? I think I’d like to see you try.”

Without so much as a word in reply, Alex leaned forward and met Willie in a kiss. It was slow and sweet and a little bit awkward. But neither of them cared about that. What mattered was that it was them. Willie pulled away first, his bright smile taking its place on his face again. But it didn’t last long. Because something flashed through him.

Alex closed his eyes against the light emanating from Willie’s body, trying not to freak out. Outside, the rain started to fall, and Alex couldn’t make himself open his eyes. He knew what he would see. More importantly, he knew who he wouldn’t see.

Eyes still shut tight; Alex landed on the studio’s couch. He only looked around once he was sure he was actually there. He didn’t need another reminder of what had happened. Didn’t need to see it again.

The studio was empty. He was alone.

Shutting his eyes, Alex let the clock rewind. He let himself slip back to the start of the day. And he waited. Waited for the drumstick. For Luke. And Julie. And Reggie.

But a hand on his shoulder pulled him out of his waiting. Opening his eyes, he saw Julie standing over him in the dark. It was dark. It was dark? She beamed down at him, still shaking him lightly. Not because she thought he was asleep, but because her excitement had turned into movement.

Sitting up, Alex smiled back at her. He could be happy for her. He could do that.

“What happened, Julie?”

“You were right! It went so well!” she flopped onto the couch, landing next to him. Head tilted back, Julie stared off into the distance as though she could see the events of the day playing on the ceiling. “She likes me… Like, actually, fully likes me.”

Alex bumped his shoulder against hers and she turned her head to look at him. “I knew she did.”

“Yeah, yeah… I just… She likes me!”

“Did anything else happen?”

“Oh! Yeah! We’re going on an official date next week!” Julie interrupted herself with a small noise of excitement, somewhere between a scream and laughter. “Me and Flynn! On a date!”

“I’m so proud of you, Jules.”

She poked him lightly in the side. “I couldn’t have done it without you.” Getting up from the couch, Julie swung her arms around absentmindedly. After a moment of standing there, she came back to herself. “I’m gonna head inside now. You wanna come with?”

Alex shook his head, smiling once more before she left. Resuming his previous position on the couch, he worried about what her conversation with him meant. Was that it? Had he gotten out of the loop? Was Willie really gone?

Something resembling sleep pulled Alex into its depths and the hours slipped away. Light peaked through the studio windows and he cracked his eyes open. Luke and Reggie were hanging out in the loft, talking amongst themselves and Julie was nowhere to be seen. But there was no drumstick. No band practice.

No Willie.

Pushing himself off the couch, Alex crept out without Luke or Reggie noticing. He wasn’t ready to talk to anyone. Wasn’t ready to exist in the day.

“Alex.”

No.

His head snapped up, searching for the source of his name. And there, standing on the last step, was Willie. Alex blinked, trying to understand what was happening. He was imagining things. Or he was dreaming. Or he was in some second form of death. Or… or he was where he’d always been with Willie standing in front of him.

“Willie? How…”

Willie laughed lightly, a familiar comfort. “You left, but I didn’t. I don’t know exactly what happened, but suddenly I was golden, and you were gone. Was the kiss that bad?”

Letting out a laugh of his own, Alex held back tears. He rushed forward, pulling Willie to him in a tight embrace. “I wouldn’t have gone if I’d known you were ok.”

“I know, hot dog. It’s alright.”

“I’m so glad you’re here.”

“Me too.”

Alex pulled back, keeping his hands on Willie’s shoulders. He checked him over, making sure he was really there. And once he was sure he was, Alex pulled Willie back into a hug. The two of them stayed there longer than most would have and when they finally separated, Alex took Willie to a nearby rose garden.

They sat on a marble bench, surrounded by beautiful blooms. Alex and Willie’s hands rested between them, interlocked.

Alex plucked a singular rose from the bush, tucking it behind Willie’s ear. He admired it for a moment, a light blush tinging his cheeks as he did. The soft pinks stood out against the dark brown of Willie’s hair. And Alex was certain he’d never seen anything as pretty.

Beauty was found in love. And his love was found in the people he cared about.

His love was found in the skater with a rose in his hair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks so much for reading !! have a great day and stay safe <3

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading,, i think i'll probably try to update this w my lukereggie fic, but i'm not sure. have a nice day and stay safe !! <3


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